01 October, 2005

Arrested Developments

There is no better free entertainment than to spend a couple of hours walking though model homes. Tim and I drove out to Providence today to tour the idealised, fingerprint free erections on display from various builders. It appears that chocolate brown and goldenrod are the two interior paint colors of choice, and people do the most interesting things with fake food and empty soda bottles.

I love walking through these places. It's a shot of hope and a chance to project a different life for yourself--a chance to envision a life where your kitchen is clean, save for the shining bowl of out-of-season fruits on the counter. If you're single, the model home is a stage for your visions of romping on the master suite bed with Mr. Right, of carnal knowledge in the garden tub. If you're newly married, all of the bedrooms decorated with ballet shoes and Burt's Baby Bee accessories are surely waiting for the perfect little twopointfivers that you envision with your hair and his eyes. The kitchen becomes the arena where you will perform the magic of perfect Thanksgiving dinners and group pasta nights. If you've been married for a bit there's always that small voice in the back of your head when you walk through a single-story house. "If I were not in this relationship it wouldn't be all bad. I could live here, in this chocolate brown room with hardwood floors and a cathedral ceiling. The gang could come over and watch the game/Sex & the City on the TV and we'd drink beer/margaritas." It's not that you want a divorce--it's not that you aren't pleased with your mate. It's just the reassurance that if things were different maybe here, in this place with the giant antique plates mysteriously affixed to the wall, those things of life could still be okay.

Of course, it's probably all the smell of the new paint and the stuff they use on the carpets. If you lived here, the mysterious plates would come down to be replaced with $10.00 prints from All Posters and framed photos of your parents. The Pier One rugs would have dog vomit stains on them and the hardwood would always be smudged with your skanky toeprints. Life is life, no matter where you live it. But for a few minutes you can be a real live Sim and dream a different one.

5 Comments:

At 6:18 PM, October 01, 2005, Blogger Rex L. Camino said...

Ah. Blogspam has provided a place for you to clean the dog vomit from the rug. Blogspam be praised.

 
At 6:46 PM, October 01, 2005, Blogger Kat Coble said...

You know...come to think of it, between my dogs and your dog, this has been the week of dog barf.

 
At 11:02 AM, October 03, 2005, Blogger Jeffrey said...

Providence place is the bomb. Cool stuff planned for the various sub-divided neighborhoods AND the retail development!

 
At 1:02 PM, October 04, 2005, Blogger Patrick said...

Heh, she said, "free erections."

I wish you had Google ads to see what THAT phrase brought up!

 
At 1:04 PM, October 04, 2005, Blogger Patrick said...

BTW, via Nashville News, you are the first hit on google for "fingerprint free erections."

 

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