30 August, 2006

Dryer Lint: When Size Really Doesn't Matter

Boy, that last post was a whole lot of stuff that didn't say anything, huh?

I did want to have something "on record" about the difference between TiVo and OnDemand. And there you have it. But the dirty secret was also that I was really ticked off about something else and didn't even want to go there so I wrote about another, dryer topic.

What am I ticked off about? Well, in another setting I happen to belong to a small group of people. There are other groups in this same setting that are much larger in size. But as is typical with gatherings of people, we've divided along several natural fault lines and those in my smaller bunch tend to be shyer and more comfortable with those they know. And I'd just received word that several key people--group sponsors--are toying with leaving the group, in part because it's too small. There is even talk of disbanding the group.

That's what makes me mad. Granted, there are only six to eight regular attenders in our group, while the next one over can boast twice that number. Should that matter? None of us are paid, so the group leaders aren't missing some type of reimbursement by facilitating a smaller bunch. There is no extra rent charged, so the existence of our smaller unit doesn't cost extra. There is another group, equally small, that is not only supported eagerly but encouraged--despite its size. Yet that group is set up to appeal to a more select demographic. Probably why no one has talked about cutting them loose.

But my bunch is the quiet group of wierdo thinkers. For various reasons--one of them being the fact that few in our group has kids--we're sort of the odd men out. I think that none of us mind that. Except apparently the leaders. Who no longer want to lead, and wonder if we should be a group at all. And that makes me feel both even more left out and abandoned.

Oh well. This is ever the problem in groups like this. This constant attempt to establish "worth". And right now I feel distinctly unworthy. Not a good thing. Here's the thing, people of America.

What you do for a living isn't who you are. Making more money than another person doesn't make you automatically better than the other person. If you live in a big house, good for you. If you drive a big car, good for you. I'm glad for your success. But the fact that something isn't large or expensive or flashy doesn't mean that it isn't important.


At 10:44 AM, August 30, 2006, Blogger Jeffrey said...


Though I'm curious, Kat, from where do you feel we derive our sense of worth?

(I know that can be read to sound condesending or know-it-all-ish, but it's simply an honest inquisition into your personal opinion ;-))

At 11:04 AM, August 30, 2006, Blogger Kerry Woo said...

Hi Kat -

My observations about men are that we are wired to ask a lot of questions to gather info.

As a general tendency, men derive their value from (1) what they do for a living (2) what they own (3) who they know.

Generally in a social setting, meeting a guy for the first time, he'll ask what I do for a living. More than likely, I'm being sized up to see if I can be of use to him or not. It's a comparison thing, but in the end it's a bit foolish.

I'll have to expand on this subject on my blog as your post touched a nerve with me.

At 11:39 AM, August 30, 2006, Blogger Kat Coble said...

Where do we derive our sense of worth? Or where SHOULD we derive our sense of worth? Two totally different answers. ;=p

Yes, most people derive their senses of worth from their bank account and the ways they fill and empty it. (As Kerry points out.) We're born in a society that emphasises "grades" in all of their forms. The higher the grade the better your performance.

We should measure our worth in the way we treat people. Are we kind? Are we patient? Do we share what truly matters--time--with people in ways that enrich us all?

If you're a Christian, you've got a pretty clear road map for living and that is where you should derive your worth. Or so I've come to believe.

At 12:42 PM, August 30, 2006, Blogger Chance said...

If one is a Christian, they should derive worth from God's love. But like Kat said, a nontheistic answer would be how one treats people.

I see different variants on how we value other people based on occupation. When I was in college, my English teacher thought that I should be a teacher, because I would help people. But instead, I wanted to be an engineer. I felt torn, because teachers do indeed help people, and his influence made it harder to see the value in being an engineer, because it seemed more individualistic.

I did see some of that in college, almost a reverse of the financial prestige scale, where some professions are more "noble" than others, i.e. an English or history degree having a more "noble" worth than a business degree. This was not typical, just something I did see from time to time.

The best thing we can do concerning an occupation is pursuing a path that makes as happy (as best as we can, we only have so much flexibility, some more than others). And, if we are a Christian, we can glorify God no matter what we do (within reason, some occupations He is not a fan of.)

At 12:32 AM, August 31, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...



Post a Comment

<< Home