Aught Six

One of my dead superstitions is the belief that how one spends New Year's Eve is a harbinger of how one will spend the upcoming year. I allowed that superstition to die around 3:30 this morning, because I cannot bring myself to believe that I will spend the entirety of 2006 lying awake in spite of the NyQuil and listening to the unceasing bass line of our Russian neighbors' party music. I'm very glad they've found a new life in the New World, and pleased that they felt free enough to discharge firearms at 2am. Honestly, though, I'm needing my sleep--if only to face January. I'm one of those people who finds January and February to be inherently depressing. It's society's sixty day sleep in the wet spot after the sensual abandon of the holidays. Even the lurid pinks of Valentine's Day seem washed out leftovers of Christmas Red, like we can't bring ourselves to let go of the decorations, and have spent 45 days storing them on our dashboard. Grrrr.
I think I'm going to start a new personal tradtion and send New Year Letters instead of Holiday Letters. Christmas cards are nice, and we got plenty of them, but I never get ours sent on time. Also, I'm guessing that people would like to get something in their mailboxes after the first of the year besides Weight Watchers coupons. Honestly, does anything say "Happy New Year, You Fat Bastard!" like a coupon for Weight Watchers? Which I got yesterday, along with a coupon for Hermitage Fitness Center. And since I've been a long time recurring member of the Weight Watchers We Sell You Hope And Guilt club, doesn't the fact that they send me coupons unbidden speak volumes about their program? Obviously they must know--deep down--that it doesn't work for the long term. Otherwise they wouldn't need to keep selling me weeks. And since they gain more money if I buy more weeks, don't they have a vested interest in seeing you NOT succeed in the long term? Oh well. It's cheaper to just not eat as much and work out regularly. At home. Cheaper still to learn to love yourself at every size.

New years resolutions? I don't make them until May 23rd, as that is technically when MY new year starts. The good thing about that is how impressive it seems when I tell people that I keep all my resolutions until June 1. What they don't know won't hurt them.