Stupid Stuff About Stupid Stuff at 3:30am

I know I've been railing a lot on "The Media" (that's like saying "they") for having non-stories. But you have to admit that when you open your browser at 3:15 am and the top story--not entertainment news, top story in ALL news--is that Scarlett Johanssen is proud of her curvy figure that we've reached a level of absurdity that will just crack you up.

In other non-news news, I have a problem. We stopped watching 24 after Season Three. Somehow I have to break it to my husband that I will need to watch this upcoming season. There are certain people I will watch in anything because I'm such a big fan of their work. I sat through both Mystery Men and Ocean's Twelve to see Eddie Izzard. Now that he's a new villain on this season of 24 I feel duty-bound to watch. The good news is that James "I'm Ridiculously Tall But Still Annoying" Cromwell will be playing Jack Bauer's long-lost papa. (Didn't they make a Raiders Of The Lost Ark about this already? ) Maybe my loyal viewership will be repaid by watching Cromwell suffer an agonising death. Or at least a torture scene. I liked him as an actor for about 93 minutes--the amount of time it took him to play Farmer Hoggett in Babe. But everything else I've seen him in I've wanted to smack him. What was that will o' the wisp accent he did in L.A. Confidential? Dude, are you Irish or not? And then he was a total idiot in Star Trek: First Contact. Honestly, his performance in that made me embarrassed for the Star Trek franchise. Right up there with Quark and Whoopi Goldberg.

Of course, I can't be the only person wondering why the 24 team didn't get Donald Sutherland to play Jack's Dad.