19 November, 2005

This Little Light Of Mine

I was going to post this as a comment over at Jason's Blog because I don't want my blog to become the anti-theatre blog. But I can't get into his comment section right now, and I still want to be able to pose my question to the Universe.

When we saw HP:GOF at the IMAX (oooh, look. I'm talking in code!) last night they had their usual announcements. The movie was sold out and they wanted us to move all the way to the center of the row. Trash should be thrown in the bins and not on the floor. But then the single oddest comment I've ever heard from theatre personnel:

"When we get ready to start the movie it gets very dark in here. Parents of small children, if you want to use your cellphone as a light, that's fine. We understand and we'll let you do that."

If you've never been to the IMAX movie, you may not realize that they kick the whole thing off with a three-minute spiel about the technology of the IMAX experience. I personally think this is solely to convince you that you paid an extra $3.00 a ticket for a good reason, as most people don't care one iota about the powerful Xenon lamps and the millions of tiny holes. They kick off this speech by having near-total darkness in the auditorium. For about 20 seconds.

All of this as a lead-in to my Question for the Universe:

If you have a child who is so frightened of a half-minute of darkness that you must light his face with a cellphone, why have you brought him to a PG-13 movie featuring moving skeletons, gravestones, skulls, snakes, dragons and death? All on a screen that is three times larger than a regular cinema screen. It would seem to follow that if Junior's nerves are that touchy, perhaps he ought to watch the film at home when it comes out on DVD. Not only will it be lighter in your house, but he will coincidentally be at least six months closer to 13.

9 Comments:

At 5:40 PM, November 19, 2005, Anonymous The Universe's Official Spokesman said...

You answered your own question. Now go find some other nerd-bait to obsess about.

 
At 6:01 PM, November 19, 2005, Blogger Kat Coble said...

There's so much nerd-bait out there, I'm not quite sure where to turn.

 
At 6:37 PM, November 19, 2005, Blogger Ivy, the Great and Powerful said...

Holy crap. People are so friggin stupid. If I had a kid that was so scared they needed a cell phone as a light, they damn sure would be to scared to watch the movie! Ay yi yi.

 
At 3:20 PM, November 20, 2005, Blogger TheKnithead said...

Of course you realize they make that statement because at some point in time a parent complained.

There is way too much nerd-bait out there.

 
At 1:06 AM, November 21, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

sorry about my comment section. I'm looking into it (translation: I'm having Giles, the site's hostmaster, look into it, but he's just back from a month in Pennsylvania for work and would probably rather spend time with his wife and 20 month old daughter). I'll get it fixed. Sorry!

Jason

 
At 2:10 AM, November 21, 2005, Blogger Kat Coble said...

Really, it isn't a big deal. It probably saves you from having to read all the drivel I come up with in reaction to the stuff you post....;-p

 
At 7:35 AM, November 21, 2005, Blogger Michael said...

Well, see if you wait for the DVD you have to put up with the whining of the small child for months on end....

 
At 11:36 AM, November 21, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

But I LIKE reading your drivel. :)

Jason

 
At 1:43 PM, November 21, 2005, Blogger Patrick said...

And how about some theater owners grow half a brain and give us what the entire Internet is asking for (better, normal priced food, adult only screenings, enforcement of ratings, etc.)

 

Post a Comment

<< Home