16 June, 2006

If I Won The Lottery

I've been speedwatching Windfall on NBC. I can get through the general idea of an episode in 8 minutes on TiVo, because I don't care so much about Russian wives and dead drug dealers. I'm just intrigued by seeing what people would do with $20million.

I like "win the lottery" stories for much the same reason that I enjoy post-apocalyptic tales. There's an element of release and triumph when the protagonist leaves the rest of oppressive society in the dust. In Win The Lottery stories you get to live through the guy who quits his dead-end job, who buys a house on the spot without fretting over contingencies and escrow. Of course all WTL stories have that other schadenfreude component where you see the big winner's life turn to krepcakes. This allows you to say to yourself "hey, I'm still in my dead-end job but at least my limbs haven't been sawed off by the Russian mafia."

During the (frequent) duller moments of Windfall, I found myself wondering what I would do with that amount of money.

First, I think I'd have to find a new church. Because when all those Baptists found out I played the lottery I'd be in serious trouble. Second, I'd have to find a new extended family--for much the same reason. But since this is fantasy instead of reality, let's assume that both my church and blood families decided to forgive me for my poor stewardship in playing.

Some money goes to the church. Other money goes to various missions endeavours. But the first thing I would do is buy back my alma mater from the Mr. Potter the man who bought it and turned it into an odd shadow of itself. I grew up with the constant struggle for money at the school, and have dreamed about "saving" it since I was 8.

After that I want to give every person in my immediate family and my husband's immediate family $100,000. Each. I'm sure they'd find something to do with it...after we all get back from two weeks at Disney World. I'd be paying off my house, putting in a pool and buying a Volvo convertable. I might also get that new lap-band surgery. The rest gets saved or invested.

It's not as fascinating as Windfall, but it's still fun to think about.


At 5:29 PM, June 16, 2006, Blogger Malia said...

First, I think I'd have to find a new church. Because when all those Baptists found out I played the lottery I'd be in serious trouble.

They would still ask for their "10 percent" though. You know they would.

At 7:56 PM, June 16, 2006, Blogger SistaSmiff said...

I always say when I win the Powerball (cause you know I will...eventually) that if my church won't accept my 10% then I'm sure SOME congregation would gladly accept it.

At 8:01 PM, June 16, 2006, Anonymous Sarcastro said...

I couldn't make it through an entire episode of Windfall. It seemed to soapy. I'll stick with Earl and the crypto-Scientology.

Lottery stories and post-apocalyptic tales appeal to me as well. I think it is because the status quo gets flipped on its head in both. The interesting bits is how people cope and adapt with that change.

Except in the case of Roseanne. That was just stupid.

Now that I think of it, I just talked to God, Smiff. He asked me to hold on to your 10% until he gets back.

At 7:19 AM, June 17, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Once our church had a lottery ticket put into the offering plate. As the deacons pondered the "offering" the pastor said that win or lose, the church could not accept the ticket because it was from gambling.

The ticket wasn't a winner (and I am real sure the donor already knew that) and that was the end of the discussion.

My thinking is we should have accepted the winnings if there were any and pay to make our building handicap accessible.

At 9:07 PM, June 17, 2006, Anonymous sbk said...

I just got back from 5 days at Disney World and I'm not sure there is enough money you could pay me to go back with either my or my hubby's family much less both of them for two weeks! Argh!...

At 2:58 PM, December 12, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

after coming across this blog i had to comment. it's the most intriguing question of all.."what if i were to win the lottery?"

i'd definitely have to take a chill pill for 2-3monts and figure out my plan...figure out how to find a good tax attorney & financial planner. take into serious consideration of how i really want to live my life. then pay all debts, set up a trust fund for my son and then prepare to travel and be homeless for a while just traveling all over the world in order to truly figure out where i want to live.

as far as family and friends....that would be tough as people do turn on you due to money changes. i'd need time to figure out how and who to help. and i really don't have a problem with saying "no".


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