11 November, 2006

Wherein I Am The Worst Mother EVER

Yes, I'm overprotective. Yes, if I had human children they'd probably grow up like Niles Crane, or at least have some serious OCD. As I'm limited to the psychological damage inflictable upon dogs, it's not so worrisome.

Unless you're the dogs.

They say it's common for dogs to limp and not usually a cause for worry. Of course "they" are not having to hear that squelchy little whimper that Casey makes whenever he has to rise up from the floor or go up and down the stairs. Besides, the last time he limped and I didn't take it seriously it turned out to be very bad. Cancer scare bad. Yes, the antibiotics made him better, and he's retained his weight so all signs point to "not cancer" but still, he was limping and it was on the same leg where the non-cancer "cancer" was. So just imagine what Ms. Overprotective Sixteen Years Running thought about that.

Yes, we piled our soon-to-be-gold-plated dog into the back of the Blazer and made haste for the betternarian. Who proceeded to diagnose a hot spot on the bottom of dude's foot. We knew the hot spot was there, and had been bathing the foot in peroxide solution for several days. But you know how they say to "trim the hair"? Apparantly you actually need to SHAVE the hair, because when that was done, my poor kid looked like part of his paw was comprised solely of ground hamburger and oozy goo.

The source of the hotspot was determined to be allergies. Great. Even though they're dogs, my kids are still nerds. If I'd walked out of that vet with an inhaler and a prescription for high-wattage eyeglasses I would not have been surprised. I'll be delighted if I can get Casey to play chess with me now.

Anyway, back to the bad mother part. As if you weren't already convinced. During the exam the doctor kept pointing out flaws in my dog grooming and care. I felt like Dog Social Services were going to come put me in handcuffs. Thing is, I thought that we had been giving our kid a ridiculously good life. He gets to lie around on a cool tile floor. He has plenty of water and not-inexpensive food and gets to run around a nice fenced-in yard as much as he likes. He has a brother to play with and does not lack for attention. He gets combed about once a week and I clean his ears twice a week. The dog is what many would consider "spoiled." But the vet apparently had different ideas. More brushing. Ear cleaning every day. More exercise.

I feel so inadequate. It sort of reminded me of going to the beauty parlor for a haircut and then being talked into $78 dollars worth of boutique hair care products. At any rate, we've dropped another Benjamin on the dog, who now has both allergy AND ear medicine. Big nerd. And if I blog less, it's only because I'm still brushing the dog.

Seriously. Who brushes their dog and cleans its ears daily?


At 4:32 PM, November 11, 2006, Blogger Exador said...

That's nothing. Zachary's ears are a constant maintainance problem. My wife cooks him white rice with peas, and cooks him over-easy eggs. She then breaks the yolks for him, because she likes the way he eats the yolk first.
Last night, she didn't get any sleep because he kept spreading out on the bed and she didn't have the heart to kick him off. I had to build a step at the foot of the bed so he can get up and down.

At 5:54 PM, November 11, 2006, Anonymous sista smiff said...

I hope you aren't like this...if you are, you're still my friend...ahem...

I know a woman who wiped her dogs ass when it came in from taking a dump.

At 6:04 PM, November 11, 2006, Blogger Kat Coble said...

I know a woman who wiped her dogs ass when it came in from taking a dump.

I am SOOOO not that person. Nope. No way.

Zachary's ears are a constant maintainance problem.

Who knew? I mean, they're EARS. I guess both Casey and Zachary have the folded-over kind, which is supposed to be a "breeding ground for infection" (My VetTM).

I had to build a step at the foot of the bed so he can get up and down.

Given how hesitant Casey is with getting up on the bed I've considered this. But we have one of those TempurPedic matresses that holds heat, so he never stays up there very long anyway.

At 9:33 PM, November 11, 2006, Anonymous bekah said...

What kind of dog is Casey? I've found that pure bred dogs are the worst when it comes to allergies and other sorts of problems. I have three dogs, and my pure bred has dealt with skin allergies her whole life - currently our vet has her on prescription food thinking her other expensive spoiled dog food was making her break out - and she's also prone to ear infections. We keep prescription ear medicine on hand. She also can only be bathed with Johnson & Johnson No More Tears baby shampoo because anything else makes her break out. My other two dogs, two perfect mutts, have never, needed the vet for anything than an ordinary yearly check up and shots.

At 10:47 PM, November 11, 2006, Blogger Kat Coble said...

That's a very good point. Casey is a Bernese Mt. Dog. They're an infamous breed for health problems, and until this summer we'd actually gotten off easy. He's been very low-maintenance until recently. I suspect a bad case of spring allergies led to his summer bone infection. Once that healed up, it was time for fall allergies, which his body isn't handling as well as usual, given his age and recent illness.

Yeah, I think you're right. Purebreeds do seem to be prone to health issues.

At 11:10 PM, November 11, 2006, Blogger Ivy, the Great and Powerful said...

I brush my longhaired dog daily. My shorthaired dogs, never. But I never, ever clean their ears, crap, I didn't know you had to.

At 12:26 AM, November 12, 2006, Blogger Chance said...

"betternarian" - What the heck is that? How do you expect us to decipher this crytpic language of yours?

At 6:31 AM, November 12, 2006, Blogger Kat Coble said...

Chance--it's a veternarian. My family has it's own stupid language from time to time.

At 11:54 AM, November 12, 2006, Blogger dailydiablogger said...

Dogs and kids are not so far apart from each other. I have three and I feel the same way every time I take them to the doctor. I'm like, doc, I'm doing all that I can and the best that I can and still you walk away feeling like a heel.

At 2:10 PM, November 12, 2006, Blogger Chance said...

Kat, I was just kidding. I'm sorry, I was in a strange mood last night. Hence my live blogging while watching the movie Face/Off last night.

At 2:36 PM, November 12, 2006, Blogger Kat Coble said...

I KINDA thought you were kidding, but I didn't want to seem rude on the off chance that you were serious. ;-p

At 10:45 PM, November 12, 2006, Anonymous triticale said...

We learned that canines such as the one my son travels with are prone to allergic hotspots if fed corn or soy. It is not easy to find dry dog food which do not contain either of these ingredients, so her diet is stretched with chicken backs from the ghetto butcher shop.

At 4:07 PM, November 13, 2006, Anonymous dsmith said...


Have you tried bathing your dog in Aledine? (it might be spelled Eladine?) It can be purchased at the co-op for about $12 and will last forever. We have a dog that was constantly itching, and Aledine has been a blessing! As soon as he starts scratching again, we give him a bath in the stuff and let it sit on him for about 2 minutes and he's good as new.

Now, about wiping a dogs ass after pooping... uh, think of the carpet man! The carpet!

At 4:27 PM, November 13, 2006, Blogger Kat Coble said...

I've never actually heard of Aledine, but I'll probably give it a try. His itching has been out of control this year.

We hadn't changed his food or any of our household cleaning products. I do wonder if there's a psychological component to it, though. His itching seemed to increase when I went into the hospital.


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