Guns Kill People, Gays Don't.
That's the comment left by a commenter below. It's also the gist of the discussion springing from that short post over at NiT. Ah, the stuff you miss when you take your company about town for some tourin'.
I laughed out loud when I read the NiT discussion, because here we had a bunch of "I'm all for the rights of people! Go people! Yay for people!" folks. Underneath all the comments about the rightness of gay marriage and the wrongness of wrongheaded constitutional jabberwockery you could see the flags waving and hear the subtle strains of people hitting that high note in 'above the fruit-ed plaaaaaain'. Yet my ONE paragraph about gun owners enjoying the same freedom from government restriction had people falling all over themselves to justify their firearms taboos.
The thrust of the argument against guns seems to hinge on the one point that guns are blood-soaked rampaging murderers while gays are nice, simple, uncomplicated entities who exist only for the betterment of all mankind. I hate this simplistic view of guns, and I hate this simplistic view of homosexuals. Repeat after me: "Guns do not kill by themselves and Gay People are not just interesting pets." The operative word is not "gay", it's "people". People are wonderfully complex and unique. Many folks seem to have the same view of gay people that they once had of the nice, sweet, darkies on the plantation. Isn't it cute how they sing? Isn't it cute how they dance? I wish I had my own gay person! Ugh. Face it. People are just people. Quit worrying about the adjectives and start focusing on the noun.
People, that most troubling of nouns, kill. They kill plants, trees, bugs, animals and other people. They have a variety of ways to do this. Allow me to list a few nouns employed by People in their quest for killing other people.
Guns--villified for their point & click ease. Yet valuable as a tool for protecting against danger. Also valuable for having fun target shooting and providing food for the family.
Knives--Can't outlaw these, because there'd be no bacon, no sushi and no other goodies. But people are killed by knives all the time.
Baseball Bats--personally I hate the sport, and would love to see these ready-made brainbusters made illegal. Clearly I am in the minority.
Toilets--If we outlaw these handy ways to drown someone then we go back to raw sewage floating down the streets as though this were the Elizabethan era. Gross.
Bathtubs--see "toilets" above.
Cars--Yeah. These kill people, too. Perhaps we should put something in the constitution about you not being allowed to have a car. That'd go over well. Although the more granola set would probably like to use this point as a way to outlaw the dreaded SUV. After spending the day around Green Hills yesterday, I might join in for the heck of it. Women of Green Hills: Your SUV is not to be used to cut a swathe through the traffic while you drink your Starbucks and talk on your cell phone.
Ballpoint pens--You can use these and any other writing instrument (except crayons) to stab someone in the carotid artery. Bloody, messy death. Yet where would churches, real estate agents and insurance brokers be without some way to make sure you carried their addresses and phone numbers in the bottom of your purse next to the gum and pennies?
Duct Tape--cover the nose, cover the mouth and people die. Yet this handy tool is so useful for so many things...kind of like a a a a ....gun.
So yes, guns kill people. So do these other things. So why do we hate the guns, folks? Why?